nicety

noun

1. (countable, uncountable)A small detail or distinction.

   “We met the new captain while we were taking enemy fire and were unable to observe the niceties of formal introductions.”

   “the fineness and niceties of words”

   “"But," the writer, Dr. Beattie, adds, "this is a needless nicety, and, if adopted, would introduce a confusion into the grammatical art. {...}"”

   “It’s just that when I’ve been stripped of my possessions, my dignity and any semblance of personal space and then strapped in for a multihour spell in the world’s most cramped and crappy bar car, the little niceties go a long way toward keeping me – keeping everyone – sane.”

2. (countable, uncountable)Subtlety or precision of use; exactness; preciseness.

   “A rocket-propelled grenade doesn't have the nicety of a sniper round, but you must admit its effectiveness.”

   “Afterwards I took it back when it was borne in upon me startlingly with what extreme nicety he had estimated the time requisite for the ‘affair.’”

   “[W]e cannot judge with exact nicety whether the hunter or the hunted has the greater dash of toe.”

3. (countable, uncountable)A delicacy of character or feeling usually from excessive refinement; fastidiousness.

   “[I]f you knew how Selina feels with respect to sleeping at an inn, you would not wonder at Mrs. Churchill’s making incredible exertions to avoid it. Selina says it is quite horror to her—and I believe I have caught a little of her nicety.”

4. (countable, uncountable)Synonym of social nicety.

   “To be sure, 2012 marks an emphatic end to the bygone courtesy of allowing the other campaign to have its convention moment. But the traditional nicety began unraveling at least two or three election cycles ago.”

   ““That was so lovely. But how come none of you ever said any of this to me?” “Because we're vampires, my squeaky-voiced, fucking berserk, nutjob, idiot friend. And sometimes we're not too good with the old niceties and kindness towards those we care about. But our hearts... are full of love.” “He's not wrong.” “I am so embarrassed.””

   “Both anthems were booed beforehand. It was never going to be a night for niceties.”

5. (countable, obsolete, uncountable)That which is delicate to the taste.

adj

1. Behaving in an unpleasant or spiteful way that is seemingly, or perceived as, pleasant or agreeable.

   “Now, believe me, I know just how tempting it is to come back with a snarky reply in the comments of these videos. I've done it here and there just to scratch the itch. It's because I've had a lot of training on how to be nicety. It was a survival tactic at Tesla. It has literally become an automatic response for me.”