untender

adj

1. Not soft; harsh.
2. Lacking sympathy, heartless, not empathetic.

   “I had not been ungenerous on the whole, / Nor yet untender;”

   “He was the first-born of his mother, but in nowise like her—she being the ugliest, stupidest, and most untender of feline animals. Her very kittens she would carry into damp corners, and under grates, and there forsake them, to be trampled to death or shovelled unwittingly on the back of the fire : […].”

   “a. 1874, Henry James, Master Eustace, in 1999, Complete Stories,1864-1874, page 656, Her parents had frowned on him and forced her into a marriage with poor dissolute Mr. Garnyer — a course the more untender as he had already spent half his own property and was likely to make sad havoc with his wife's.”

   “She would let me know in a most untender manner if Brother Fielding told her I wasn't proficient.”